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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 4, 2019 20:33:58 GMT 10
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 4, 2019 20:34:55 GMT 10
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 4, 2019 20:59:27 GMT 10
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 10, 2019 20:36:27 GMT 10
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Post by Peter on Mar 10, 2019 21:39:11 GMT 10
Yep, Spike Milligan was one of the comedic greats. A true genius.
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 11, 2019 15:26:15 GMT 10
Yep, Spike Milligan was one of the comedic greats. A true genius. And after this, he sent Prince Charles a message asking if he was still going to be knighted. Prince Charles replied "Stop grovelling" What a ripper!
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Post by Peter on Mar 13, 2019 23:35:42 GMT 10
Enough said.
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 14, 2019 19:17:56 GMT 10
Q: Did you hear about the winner of the English beauty contest? A: Me neither.
Q: Why do the English make better lovers than the Germans? A: Because English are the only one's who can stay on top for 45 minutes and still come second.
Q: Whats the difference between Cinderella and the England football team? A: Cinderella wanted to get to the ball
Q: Why aren't the England football team allowed to own a dog? A: Because they can't hold on to a lead.
Q: What do you call an Englishman in the knockout stages of the World Cup? A: A Referee.
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Post by SA Hunter on Mar 14, 2019 19:21:39 GMT 10
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
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Post by spinifex on Apr 14, 2019 19:32:52 GMT 10
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Post by spinifex on Apr 14, 2019 19:39:58 GMT 10
Should be 'How to work with snowflakes!' There are productive millenials out there.
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Post by spinifex on Apr 14, 2019 19:45:33 GMT 10
Fall down funny!
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Post by SA Hunter on Apr 14, 2019 20:38:31 GMT 10
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senor, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use three english words in a sentence. The three words are 'green,' 'pink,' and 'yellow.'" The Mexican man thinks , then says, "Hmmm, okay. The phone, it went green, green, green. I pink it up and sez yellow?"
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Post by spinifex on Apr 22, 2019 18:43:41 GMT 10
Hear it to the end ... it's brilliant.
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Post by spinifex on Apr 22, 2019 18:45:52 GMT 10
and then hear the above from a different perspective! ... I'll never look at a scissor lift or Cockatiel the same again!
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Post by spinifex on Apr 22, 2019 19:04:41 GMT 10
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Post by spinifex on Apr 22, 2019 19:17:14 GMT 10
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Post by SA Hunter on Apr 30, 2019 13:33:48 GMT 10
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Post by Peter on May 2, 2019 23:51:36 GMT 10
I know, I'm a dork for liking string quartets and the like. But this is hilarious.
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Post by SA Hunter on May 7, 2019 15:11:39 GMT 10
A little boy goes to his Dad and asks, 'What is Politics?'
Dad says, 'Well son, let Me try to explain it this way:
I am the head of the Family, so call me The Prime Minister.
Your mother is the Administrator of the money,
So we call her the Government.
We are here to take care Of your needs, so we will call you the People.
The nanny, we will consider her the Working Class.
And your baby brother, we will call him the Future.
Now think about that and see if it makes sense.'
So the little boy goes Off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.
Later that night, he Hears his baby brother crying,
So he gets up to check on him.
He finds that the baby Has severely soiled his nappy.
So the little boy goes To his parent's room
And finds his mother asleep.
Not wanting to wake her,
He goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked,
he peeks in the keyhole and
Sees his father in bed with the nanny..
He gives up and goes back to bed.
The next morning, the Little boy say's to his father,
'Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now. '
The father says,
'Good, son, tell me in your own words What you think politics is all about.'
The little boy replies,
'The Prime Minister
Is screwing the Working Class
While the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and The Future is in deep shit.'
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